Sometimes I don't even know how to communicate with you.
Bye.
Sunday 2 November 2014
Sunday 16 March 2014
I just need a place to express my thoughts.
So after how long since my last post? 2 years I guess? well, i guess or i am pretty sure that no one will read this blog anymore since its like left out for more than 2 years already. Which is a good place for me to express my feelings. Since I cant tweet as he will just come and shoot me back whatever I tweets and I really cannot take it. I mean like yes I know whatever I tweet you will see it but can you like pretend you dont know or pretend you didn see it??? its like I want to take a breathe but I cant because everything around me is poisonous once i inhale i would die. sigh.
ok I dont know why i want to say this since no one is reading but i just say for the sake of saying la k? So after near 3 years of being single. I am now attached to a guy (ofcourse) and we have been together for 11 months already... and you (probably none) will be wondering then why after 11th month then want to start blogging about him? firstly is because im lazy and secondly because I always wanted to but I dont have the freaking timeeeeeee to blog unlike last time i can blog yet cope with my shitty relationship and my schoolwork but now no. Poly life is not F.U.N at all fyi the work the assignment the project is like non stop.... especially my course which are popular for endless projects.
Alright, back to that guy I mentioned above. (why m i keep doing this? no one is even reading -.-) So I met him 1 year ago (ya duh~) and he chase me for like i think 1.5 months only then we got together... ya ya ya i know I told myself no more meet awhile then attached OK OK I KNOW my brain and my heart cannot cope well I also remember I told myself that my next bf MUST at least know each other more than A YEAR then can together. well.... shit always happen.... its not that Im not happy with him or dont love him anymore. .. is just I SOMETIMES SERIOUSLY COULD NOT STAND HIS ATTITUDE THO I KNOW I HAVE A BAD ATTITUDE TOO BUT DONT MESS UP MY LIFE IF YOU THE ONE WHO STARTED IT!!!
So basically this guy, my bf, know about 75% of my previous relationship so I would "expect" him to be more understanding because I am still VERY EMOTIONAL and NEGATIVE THINKING (and i remember I told him alot of time before we together, before I accept him, before he keep on chasing me) and ask him if he still want TO TAKE THE RISK IF I AM LIKE THAT and he say he dont mind so ok. So in this relationship im no longer the old me. I change alot (ofcourse who wouldnt change after being hurt so so so badly) i change to be more mean more carefree more typical kind of gf.... well... he is a good guy i agreed and I admit... as he can endure all my bad temper (tho his temper is worst than me) my complains my flaws and everything that is bad in me. well same goes to me i can endure everything too.. BUT THERE IS THIS ONE IN A MILLION THING I CANNOT AND NEVER CAN ENDURE NOR ACCEPT IT WHICH IS EMPTY PROMISE. For example 1: Baby, I will come find you later* few hours later* baby I cannot come find you ler because.....example 2: Tomorrow I will come find you na *next day* never mention anything about it and the time just tick tock away... example 3: I will wait you at mrt at xxx stop me:you coming to that xxx stop? him: I at home le leh... example 4: tmr I will come find you me:nvm la i know you wont him:no i will. me:you confirm first? him:yes confirm *next day* something up cannot find.
I HAD ENOUGH DISAPPOINTMENT IN MY LIFE I BEG YOU I PLEASE YOU STOP GIVING ME DISAPPOINTMENT ANYMORE... ESPECIALLY ALWAYS SAY THINGS THAT WONT HAPPEN... I HATE BEING HAPPY AT FIRST AND AT THE END ALL I GET IS NOTHING EXCEPT DISAPPOINTMENT AND SADNESS.... I HATE WAITING HAPPILY AND TURN OUT WAITING FOR NOTHING.... I HATE IT I HATE IT I FKING HATE IT SO MUCH......YOU CAN DO WHATEVER TO ME BUT THE ONLY THINGS I CANT ACCEPT IS THIS....IF YOU CANNOT MAKE IT THEN DONT SAY IT SO EARLY AND MAKE ME EXPECT SOMETHING AND THEN NOTHING...... I TOLD YOU IDK HOW MANY TIMES THAT DONT SAY THINGS YOU CANNOT DO IT AND YOU SAY OK TO ME AND WHAT IS THIS?! JUST ONLY YESTERDAY HAPPEN 2 TIMES AGAIN? FIRST EARLY IN THE MORNING TOLD ME YOU WILL COME FIND ME LATER END UP SOMETHING UP, SECOND SAY WOULD WAIT ME AT MRT AND THEN NO CUZ U EFFING AT HOME ALREADY. OK YOU MIGHT NOT NOTICE THAT BECAUSE YOU ARE NOT ME BUT EVENTHO ITS JUST LITTLE THING ITS STILL HURT MY FEELING.... I DONT KNOW YOU WANT ME TO SAYY HOW MANY TIMES THEN YOU CAN UNDERSTAND....YOU CAN DO WHATEVER YOU WANT SAY WHATEVER YOU WANT JUST DONT MAKE EMPTY PROMISES...OR EMPTY AGREEMENTS....BECAUSE I WILL EXPECT SOMETHING AND EXCITED ABOUT IT EVERY TIME YOU MADE THOSE AGREEMENT/STATEMENTS/PROMISES. HAIH....
EVERYTIME I START ARGUE WITH YOU IS ALL BECAUSE OF THIS... THIS IS JUST THE ONLY REASON WILL MAKE ME FIRE.... THE REST WILL BE JUST MEH TO ME JUST LIKE YESTERDAY~ IF YOU NEVER SAID THOSE THING TO ME IN THE MORNING OR IN THE MRT YESTERDAY FIGHT WONT HAPPEN.... I NEVER TELL YOU BECAUSE IM SO TIRED OF KEEP REPEATING THE SAME THING OVER AND OVER AND OVER AND OVER AND FKING OVER AGAIN!!!!!!!
I GOT SO MUCH TO SAY BUT SAYING THIS MAKE ME SO ARGH... i cannot continue anymore... this is my weakness or should i say is my bomb? shall just continue next time... now i really wish you can read this so you can stop saying stuff that wont make it at the end(AND EVEN IF YOU READING PLS PRETEND YOU NEVER READ AND DONT COME AND SHOOT ME )... even though i know sometimes you really want to make it but really something came up then if like that dont say it so early then until you really really really confirm then tell me.... i dont know how many times more disappointment i can handle.. please... i dont want this to be the reason why we fall apart.. i know this is being selfish because i only care about my own feeling.. but well like i said.. i change. is either you accept or reject.
ok I dont know why i want to say this since no one is reading but i just say for the sake of saying la k? So after near 3 years of being single. I am now attached to a guy (ofcourse) and we have been together for 11 months already... and you (probably none) will be wondering then why after 11th month then want to start blogging about him? firstly is because im lazy and secondly because I always wanted to but I dont have the freaking timeeeeeee to blog unlike last time i can blog yet cope with my shitty relationship and my schoolwork but now no. Poly life is not F.U.N at all fyi the work the assignment the project is like non stop.... especially my course which are popular for endless projects.
Alright, back to that guy I mentioned above. (why m i keep doing this? no one is even reading -.-) So I met him 1 year ago (ya duh~) and he chase me for like i think 1.5 months only then we got together... ya ya ya i know I told myself no more meet awhile then attached OK OK I KNOW my brain and my heart cannot cope well I also remember I told myself that my next bf MUST at least know each other more than A YEAR then can together. well.... shit always happen.... its not that Im not happy with him or dont love him anymore. .. is just I SOMETIMES SERIOUSLY COULD NOT STAND HIS ATTITUDE THO I KNOW I HAVE A BAD ATTITUDE TOO BUT DONT MESS UP MY LIFE IF YOU THE ONE WHO STARTED IT!!!
So basically this guy, my bf, know about 75% of my previous relationship so I would "expect" him to be more understanding because I am still VERY EMOTIONAL and NEGATIVE THINKING (and i remember I told him alot of time before we together, before I accept him, before he keep on chasing me) and ask him if he still want TO TAKE THE RISK IF I AM LIKE THAT and he say he dont mind so ok. So in this relationship im no longer the old me. I change alot (ofcourse who wouldnt change after being hurt so so so badly) i change to be more mean more carefree more typical kind of gf.... well... he is a good guy i agreed and I admit... as he can endure all my bad temper (tho his temper is worst than me) my complains my flaws and everything that is bad in me. well same goes to me i can endure everything too.. BUT THERE IS THIS ONE IN A MILLION THING I CANNOT AND NEVER CAN ENDURE NOR ACCEPT IT WHICH IS EMPTY PROMISE. For example 1: Baby, I will come find you later* few hours later* baby I cannot come find you ler because.....example 2: Tomorrow I will come find you na *next day* never mention anything about it and the time just tick tock away... example 3: I will wait you at mrt at xxx stop me:you coming to that xxx stop? him: I at home le leh... example 4: tmr I will come find you me:nvm la i know you wont him:no i will. me:you confirm first? him:yes confirm *next day* something up cannot find.
I HAD ENOUGH DISAPPOINTMENT IN MY LIFE I BEG YOU I PLEASE YOU STOP GIVING ME DISAPPOINTMENT ANYMORE... ESPECIALLY ALWAYS SAY THINGS THAT WONT HAPPEN... I HATE BEING HAPPY AT FIRST AND AT THE END ALL I GET IS NOTHING EXCEPT DISAPPOINTMENT AND SADNESS.... I HATE WAITING HAPPILY AND TURN OUT WAITING FOR NOTHING.... I HATE IT I HATE IT I FKING HATE IT SO MUCH......YOU CAN DO WHATEVER TO ME BUT THE ONLY THINGS I CANT ACCEPT IS THIS....IF YOU CANNOT MAKE IT THEN DONT SAY IT SO EARLY AND MAKE ME EXPECT SOMETHING AND THEN NOTHING...... I TOLD YOU IDK HOW MANY TIMES THAT DONT SAY THINGS YOU CANNOT DO IT AND YOU SAY OK TO ME AND WHAT IS THIS?! JUST ONLY YESTERDAY HAPPEN 2 TIMES AGAIN? FIRST EARLY IN THE MORNING TOLD ME YOU WILL COME FIND ME LATER END UP SOMETHING UP, SECOND SAY WOULD WAIT ME AT MRT AND THEN NO CUZ U EFFING AT HOME ALREADY. OK YOU MIGHT NOT NOTICE THAT BECAUSE YOU ARE NOT ME BUT EVENTHO ITS JUST LITTLE THING ITS STILL HURT MY FEELING.... I DONT KNOW YOU WANT ME TO SAYY HOW MANY TIMES THEN YOU CAN UNDERSTAND....YOU CAN DO WHATEVER YOU WANT SAY WHATEVER YOU WANT JUST DONT MAKE EMPTY PROMISES...OR EMPTY AGREEMENTS....BECAUSE I WILL EXPECT SOMETHING AND EXCITED ABOUT IT EVERY TIME YOU MADE THOSE AGREEMENT/STATEMENTS/PROMISES. HAIH....
EVERYTIME I START ARGUE WITH YOU IS ALL BECAUSE OF THIS... THIS IS JUST THE ONLY REASON WILL MAKE ME FIRE.... THE REST WILL BE JUST MEH TO ME JUST LIKE YESTERDAY~ IF YOU NEVER SAID THOSE THING TO ME IN THE MORNING OR IN THE MRT YESTERDAY FIGHT WONT HAPPEN.... I NEVER TELL YOU BECAUSE IM SO TIRED OF KEEP REPEATING THE SAME THING OVER AND OVER AND OVER AND OVER AND FKING OVER AGAIN!!!!!!!
I GOT SO MUCH TO SAY BUT SAYING THIS MAKE ME SO ARGH... i cannot continue anymore... this is my weakness or should i say is my bomb? shall just continue next time... now i really wish you can read this so you can stop saying stuff that wont make it at the end(AND EVEN IF YOU READING PLS PRETEND YOU NEVER READ AND DONT COME AND SHOOT ME )... even though i know sometimes you really want to make it but really something came up then if like that dont say it so early then until you really really really confirm then tell me.... i dont know how many times more disappointment i can handle.. please... i dont want this to be the reason why we fall apart.. i know this is being selfish because i only care about my own feeling.. but well like i said.. i change. is either you accept or reject.
Sunday 16 September 2012
3 Day 2 Night in Chalet
HII! yes I know that I said I would blog often but I didnt. This is because I thought that I would be more free and can spend more time blogging when i stop working, but i never thought that I would be more busy than i was working. Why? As you know or you not know, now my house got THREE BABIES! two baby nieces and one baby nephew. So most of my time was spend on them! taking care of them , playing with them, feed them and stuff.
Its like im a fully baby sitter -.- with great paid. lol i wish my brother would appreciate it that they got a wonderful sister that willing to take care of their babies. I really wanted to blog so badly but my eldest baby niece is so naughty, she just pass her birthday which mean she is one years old now. she know how to walk, shout and best at DESTROYING THING. So everytime when i on my laptop this little monster sure will come to my laptop and anyhow smash the keyboard. and it do make me freaking stress out sometimes because I just want a few minutes to check my things also CANNOT!
Now I lock myself in my room, so that i could blog. but dont get me wrong. I still love all my babies nieces and nephew. But I do get very frustrated and irritating sometimes because Claire(the eldest one) is so naughty.
Anyway this blog is gonna be about how we spend our time in CHALET! If you follow me in twitter then you know my brother is celebrating his daughter one years old birthday party and son one month at the same time in the chalet. Claire birthday was on sept 5th and Jayden (the baby boy) was on aug 5th. Yeap so coincident so both of this sibling age gap is just 11 months. tsk!
We celebrate their one month and birthday on the actual in our house because during that time was holiday and the chalet is mad expensive during peak day that one day cost $500. so we delay it to sept 9th.
lol sorry for writing so much, now i look at it I feel like I was writing a composition haha. anyway so lets start with the picture! =D
He is my baby nephew JAYDEN!
I love this shot! Im quite a professional photographer! haha kidding
I love this shot the most!
Its like im a fully baby sitter -.- with great paid. lol i wish my brother would appreciate it that they got a wonderful sister that willing to take care of their babies. I really wanted to blog so badly but my eldest baby niece is so naughty, she just pass her birthday which mean she is one years old now. she know how to walk, shout and best at DESTROYING THING. So everytime when i on my laptop this little monster sure will come to my laptop and anyhow smash the keyboard. and it do make me freaking stress out sometimes because I just want a few minutes to check my things also CANNOT!
Now I lock myself in my room, so that i could blog. but dont get me wrong. I still love all my babies nieces and nephew. But I do get very frustrated and irritating sometimes because Claire(the eldest one) is so naughty.
Anyway this blog is gonna be about how we spend our time in CHALET! If you follow me in twitter then you know my brother is celebrating his daughter one years old birthday party and son one month at the same time in the chalet. Claire birthday was on sept 5th and Jayden (the baby boy) was on aug 5th. Yeap so coincident so both of this sibling age gap is just 11 months. tsk!
We celebrate their one month and birthday on the actual in our house because during that time was holiday and the chalet is mad expensive during peak day that one day cost $500. so we delay it to sept 9th.
lol sorry for writing so much, now i look at it I feel like I was writing a composition haha. anyway so lets start with the picture! =D
she is my second niece, baby Elva!
On our way to Chalet. I was carrying baby Jayden.
My da bao lor. Claire!
This is how the chalet look like! Its actually a bungalow. How I wish this is my house cuz its huge! but in singapore i guess only millionaire can afford this kind of house.
The dinning area.
The kitchen.
Staircase.
Two bed rooms.
She was the most excited one because there is a huge place for her to walk and run!
the living room! huge right!
Trying to take a picture that I was taking care of two babies at the same time! the one I carry was Elva and the one sleeping on my thigh was Jayden.
Cant really take the whole photo because my hand was too short T.T
and there is a super big mirror infront of the staircase!!!
she love bag so much! she pulling my grandma hand bag!
and here come the buffet!
My brother ordered vegetarian food. All of it was vegetarian except this two. The restaurant said that they was a mistaken that they cook this two as real meat. Which is so EPIC FAIL. And i dont really like the food. Not tasty at all. yuck~
trying to open her new toy!
He is my cousin's son.
the other side was bbq and it was raining so they use umbrealla. haha so unlucky.
The next day we was bbq-ing too and lucky it didn rain and i didn take the photo we bbq cuz im pretty sure that my daddy will nag me if i take the photo.
Her birthday cake!
family photo.
Brother's friends, there is more but they didnt want to take photo.
And i was so angry because I want to take a family photo but my parents say there is too many people what they dont want what shit what da bian la say the next day still can take. AT THE END ALSO DONT HAVE! EVERYTIME LIKE THAT very JILAKA one! uh!
This was the second day.
Its so hard to make her laugh! I mean its easy but everytime when you trying to take her photo she never laugh or smile -.-
i really love her eyes. So big and round!
Going to Swimming woohoo! Look so terrible because i slept very late last night and didnt apply anything. haha
here is the swimming pool!
baby pool
adult pool!
she really love swimming so much! She had alot of fun! splashing the water, laughing~ haha she not even scare!!
My mami!
My dad. To be honest. It look like my dad is having more fun than her. haha
me. OMFG I LOOK SO ASDFGHJKL
taking off the bee hat cuz she really hate wearing hate or putting something on her hair. weird girl~
apart from taking pictures, I was playing with her all day long. haha
Then I got darken -.- and she also became darken, SADLIFE.
haha have fun playing herself in such a big pool.
now her mami came down to the pool too!
haha oh forgot to said that time the pool only got us no one else except the life guard. Because it was monday so everyone left already I mean those other people who stay in the other bungalow.
After a long play, she must be so tired. She actually sleep so long for several days.
but baby Jayden was wide awake!
but im here so its always easy to make baby sleep =p
to hire a baby sitter dont hesitate to call me! haha jokes.
this was the last day. need to check out on 9am so me and mami decide to go to the sea side to have a walk together with claire.
feeling moody all day long because she knew that we're going home?
look pale cuz didn apply make up ><
play ground!
she was having fun when sliding down. but when I tried to take a photo of her...
she gave me this kind of pose and face. god why are you so ugly! haha but she's cute so its okay.
trying to climb up but keep fail cuz it was too sloppy.
and lastly took this photo cuz i think this car was quite cute and remind me of mr.bean.
and guess what? i think this person is a huge fans of Mr.bean because...
I saw this bear! haha
Alright gonna end my post here.
will really try to blog as much as possible if i have the time
you know taking care a baby is a hard job
but you wont know how hard it is when there is three babies in the house.
but anyway if you want to know what happen to me recently (if you're interested but i think there is no one lol) you can follow me in
twitter! janjan1210
and see the latest photo of me or my babies nieces and nephew you can follow me in my instagram!
jlovee05
Ok thats all!
Have a good day and i hope you enjoy it.
BYEBYE <3
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